Thursday, July 26, 2007
Putting the SOB into OB
My husband and I went on a date last night to see the movie, "Knocked Up." I thought it would be funny and sweet. It was kinda. (I actually liked the movie "Waitress" much better with a similar theme.) I later realized upon reflection that the birth scenes left a really bad taste in my mouth. Actually, upon reflection, I hated those scenes. While I was watching them, I had an out of body experience and was right back in my labor and delivery nurse role. I hated that OB in the movie, the actor's portrayal of a self-centered arrogant SOB was so on target (forgive me, any OB readers!). His performance really did remind me of about 80% of the docs I worked with. (As a nurse, I began to believe that OBs as a group didn't really like women and that they became OBs as a socially sanctioned way to torture them.) It did remind me of all the medical abuse I witnessed and assisted in. I feel so grateful to be out of that vocation (sorry all my L&D nurse readers!) That's why I can't attend anymore (hospital) births- I can't stand witness to the abuse anymore. Even if I attend just as a 'friend' I'm still totally intuned to all the fine nuances that go on around me. I know when the nurse is afraid of the doctor, or when the doctor thinks the mom is a nutjob. I know when the mom is being bullshitted with big fancy words, to manipulate her behavior. I just can't stand to bear witness to it anymore. Birth is no longer a beautiful act of nature for me- its an opportunity to watch a woman be debassed, manipulated, and dishonored. I can't even watch a fake birth anymore.