Josiah is two weeks old today. How can it be, we've only had him two weeks and he is such a part of us, such an integral part of our family? We had our first visit to the pediatrician yesterday. She offered me formula, in case of an emergency. I tried to envision some emergency, short of a coma or death, that would induce me to give my little guy formula. Funny, I couldn't think of a one. Other than the formula offer, (and I still can't figure out why she felt compelled to ask ME that, twice!) Josiah was in fine form and had gained a pound. He had a little jaundice the first week but it had mostly cleared up by yesterday, to my relief. When last I worked in the hospitals (earlier this year) the bilirubin protocols were simply out of control. Picture two pages of algorithms briming with risk factors (of which breastfeeding was one), designed to keep kernicterus on high alert. (There must have been a high dollar malpractice suit here in town lately.) I was concerned that the Ped would want bili levels but she was satisfied that he was fine, (as was I). We did have to have his PKU redrawn. The midwife did it but it came back. What an ordeal! It took forever to get it done in the hospital lab, but fortunately, Josiah slept through the procedure. The lab went and got someone who was good at baby sticks, so I shouldn't complain about how long it took. We talked about immunizations (which I do 'selectively'). I must say, it's nice to have a Ped that I don't have to argue with about this. I've had to change Peds over this issue in the past. All in all, my Ped and I don't tend to bump heads, but I'm skittish about Peds in general. I do think they tend to be lukewarm on breastfeeding when they should be (in my opinion) its biggest promotors. I did love the fact, that as we went from the Ped office to the hospital lab, I realized that Josiah had never been in a hospital nursery, out of my sight. I took such comfort in that thought. The Ped also asked about a circ, which I refuse to have done. What a horrific procedure to inflict upon a newborn, and for what? I'm tired of the AAP's lukewarm policy on circs (changed 3 times in the last decade) this last time to say nothing definitive. But Josiah will, like my younger boys, remain intact.
Josiah also attended his first play yesterday, as he and I and my 18 year old went to see my friend Julie in the lead role of "The Hiding Place" the story of Corrie Ten Boom, whose family hid Jews in their home during the German occupation of The Netherlands. I had read the book when I was in my twenties and remembered it in detail as the play progressed. It was a stunning performance (Josiah slept through the whole thing) and I was so proud of Julie, and got to tell her so, as she cuddled Josiah after the performance. There was a scene where a young Jewish mother with a newborn came to the Ten Booms seeking refuge. I held Josiah tight thinking what would I do if he were in danger, at risk in some way. How I would give my very life to preserve his. His little life is in my hands. It is at once a joyous and somber task. He makes me want to be a better mother.